Haute Couture: Spring 2015. The Hits and Misses

Like I said, this season was rather lax on variety, but a few standouts managed to peek through the cracks.

Here are the best and the worst (in my opinion) from the spring couture runways.

Alexandre Vauthier

Alexandre Vauthier
Damn that’s a saaaaaaxy dress! It’s a bit too much on this side of vamp for many clients, but when the model looks that good in it, it’s hard to resist.

Alexis Mabille

Alexis Mabille
The entire collection was good, but this piece just tugged at my heart strings. I love the insane scale of the bow-drape and the simplicity of the colors.
This is couture in its purest form.

Armani Prive

Armani Privé
Yeah, this one is stunning.
The color is perfect and the cut, although simple, delivers grace perfectly.

Elie Saab

Elie Saab
OK, see this is a perfect example of what marvelous things can happen when Saab gets his hands dirty with textiles and embellishments. This is the kind of gown that punches the rest of the collection in the gut and then spits on the competition in victory. This is exactly what we need from Saab. He’s proven he can do “pretty;” now, let’s see pretty with a side of rebellion.

Chanel

Chanel
Karl, I don’t know what the Hell kind of acid you tripped on before coming up with this turkey, but put it down, buddy; your dealer did you wrong. Ugh. From the grandpa socks and shoes to the overt floral appliques, this is one garden that Peter Rabbit need NEVER go into.

Dior

Christian Dior
The words plastic, housecoat, go-go boots and purple should never be uttered in the same sentence, yet here we are.
This unfortunate model looks like an intergalactic cleaning lady from the 9th dimension.
And she don’t do windows.

Jantaminiau Couture Spring Summer 2015 Paris

Jantaminiau Couture
OK, as much fun as this collection was, not everything worked. The cut of this is skewing a bit schmatta, and the expression on the model’s face mirrors my own confusion as to why the word SPAM appears on the applique, but overall it’s a bit… ok, yeah, it’s terrible.

Serkan Cura Couture Spring Summer 2015 Paris

Serkan Cura
Last season it was female reproductive organs, now, blonde pubes. Not sure if these guys are fixated on lady parts or if there is a message to be read here. Either way, this coat is in serious need of a Brazilian.

Valentino

Valentino
“Ja. Vee have for you fine foods from old country. Fresh fruit and wegtables gather by hand from strong backs of vorking motherland. Zample our age cheeses, zoups of many herbs and meat of such flavors. Table for one?”

Viktor and Rolf

Viktor and Rolf
Some people wear flowers on their lapels.
This is what happens when you let the flowers wear you!
Once again the little Dutch boys wend Johnny One Note with their collection and once again, I’m over it. I used to respect them for their couture prowess, not I just sit back and wonder where it all went wrong.
Is this a technically difficult feat to pull off? You bet! Is it imaginative? Sure it. Is there any variety in the collection that would in any way, shape or form hold interest past the third look?
Hell no.

That’s it for fashion this season. The New York collections happen in March, but I’ll be back before then with news and updates.

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